Mass Effect

[Eleven]

  On 3/18/2012 at 9:26 PM, jimmuhpage said:

 

Adepts

http://pancakesinspa...pt-is-best-dept

 

 

 

 

I am an Adept myself (Human). I can vouch that most things this link says is true. It's fun!

[TheMightyEthan]

 

lmfbo! That is so me.

 

"No, Henry, wait until I use singularity before biotic-charging them!"

 

*Edit*

 

 

Also this. (Infiltrator being my main MP class.) My friends always say they know every time I miss because of the expletives...

Edited March 19, 2012 by TheMightyEthan

[Hot Heart]

Hmm, that laser-targeting bit was a little annoying. Nowhere near as bad as the end of Halo: Reach, thankfully.

 

And I felt like a big goddamn hero with the section right after it.

[Hot Heart]

Chris Livingston (creator of Concerned and other funny videogame writings) on ME3.

 

  Quote

Finished Mass Effect 3 last night. Great game, great series. Not mad about the ending but certainly deflated. My thinking is, Bioware ran a marathon. Finished first. Shit their pants as they crossed the finish line, but still deserve the medal.

[Vargras]

  On 3/19/2012 at 4:53 PM, Hot Heart said:

Chris Livingston (creator of Concerned and other funny videogame writings) on ME3.

 

  Quote

Finished Mass Effect 3 last night. Great game, great series. Not mad about the ending but certainly deflated. My thinking is, Bioware ran a marathon. Finished first. Shit their pants as they crossed the finish line, but still deserve the medal.

 

That's... quite accurate, really.

 

Also, I'm still laughing over those ME3 MP memes. It's kinda surprising just how many of those are true.

[Vargras]

 

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The object name. Oh god, the object name. Indoctrination Theory might not be that far off.

 

 

 

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And a silly picture too.

 

Edited March 19, 2012 by Vargras

[TheMightyEthan]

Nice.

 

*Edit* - So Bioware's statements are slowly giving ground. Now they're saying they "have nothing ruled out" in terms of possibly changing the ending. Wonder what that PR guy on the BW forums makes of this.

 

http://www.gameinformer.com/b/news/archive/2012/03/19/bioware-undecided-over-changing-mass-effect-3-39-s-endings.aspx

Edited March 19, 2012 by TheMightyEthan

[Vargras]

Man, the shit I find on tumblr.

 

 

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It's all giving increasing support to the Indoctrination/Dream theories. Take a look at the pictures below.

 

This is what you see right as you get smacked with Harbinger's giant laser of get-the-fuck-out.

 

This is what you see any time Shepard enters/exits one of the dream sequences in the game.

 

Looks awfully similar, no? In addition, if you turn around after regaining control, you can apparently spot the burned out trees from the dreams. And last I saw, there weren't any trees in bombed-out 22nd century London.

 

[Waldorf and Statler]

 

 

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The last thing we see is our teammates running along with us towards the beam. Then a white flash and the ending sequence, then all of a sudden we see them coming out of the Normandy. Everybody is cheering but not me. OH NOT ME.

 

You know what I did? I got up and started screaming "What are you all cheering for? They're lying to us. This isn't possible! How could Joker be leaving? How did Garrus and Tali get inside the COCK-A-DOODY NORMANDY!

 

[Vargras]

  On 3/19/2012 at 6:08 PM, Waldorf And Statler said:

 

 

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The last thing we see is our teammates running along with us towards the beam. Then a white flash and the ending sequence, then all of a sudden we see them coming out of the Normandy. Everybody is cheering but not me. OH NOT ME.

 

You know what I did? I got up and started screaming "What are you all cheering for? They're lying to us. This isn't possible! How could Joker be leaving? How did Garrus and Tali get inside the COCK-A-DOODY NORMANDY!

 

 

The more I read and the more I see, the more I'm convinced that the whole 'Indoctrination Theory' thing might be legit, and that Bioware is trolling the shit out of us.

 

In regards to TheMightyEthan's link: I'm sort of indifferent, really. Though the endings were a bit of a let-down, I'm not putting all of my eggs in one basket and going "THEY BETTER CHANGE THE ENDINGS OR ELSE". If they do change the endings, cool. If not, whatever. Doesn't affect me too much one way or the other. If anything, I'm just happy that they're aware of what's going on and that they're listening.

[Waldorf and Statler]

I'm in a similar boat. If they change the ending and they were trolling us this entire time they'll regain my love for them.

 

If they don't, they'll lose what was once a die-hard fan. DA2 didn't ruin it for me like many did, but ME3's ending will be the final straw.

 

I'll still play their titles, just not buy them.

[Mister Jack]

 

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It all makes sense now! The catalyst was Xzibit the whole time!

 

[Waldorf and Statler]

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

[CorgiShinobi]

 

Quite frankly, if I were not a Sentinel, most of my teams would be dead from Guardians. It was only once, but some fool was the only one left alive and we had one more target to kill before time ran out. What did he do the entire 45 seconds left? Tried to kill a single Guardian with the default pistol. Nevermind that you should roll behind them if you don't have a sniper rifle or Throw, he just kept facing him head on.

 

Took out three Guardians in a row when I was the only one left alive. Hopefully my teammates of the time were watching how to handle them.

[Vargras]

  On 3/19/2012 at 6:53 PM, Atomsk88 said:

 

Quite frankly, if I were not a Sentinel, most of my teams would be dead from Guardians. It was only once, but some fool was the only one left alive and we had one more target to kill before time ran out. What did he do the entire 45 seconds left? Tried to kill a single Guardian with the default pistol. Nevermind that you should roll behind them if you don't have a sniper rifle or Throw, he just kept facing him head on.

 

Took out three Guardians in a row when I was the only one left alive. Hopefully my teammates of the time were watching how to handle them.

 

Guardians are the sole reason why I keep the piercing mod on my heavy pistols.

 

Fuck your shield, I have armor-piercing bullets.

[CorgiShinobi]

I've got mixed feelings about the piercing mod. At least in single player it never seems worth it. I had it on my Geth Assault Rifle and when facing non-armored enemies it just took a little too long to take out the common enemy types due to the near half damage reduction.

 

I always have Garrus in my squad, so I have him use Armor-Piercing Ammo for the squad.

 

EDIT: Of course, in multiplayer it would be a different story, but I also like to keep my weapons to two and thus I stick with an assault rifle and sniper rifle. In single player, I have three but that's thanks to the Ultralight Materials V mod for my SMG. Thing barely weighs anything and I have a +96% Power Recharge Speed

Edited March 19, 2012 by Atomsk88

[jimmuhpage]

On most of my classes, I just go with Predator X and Shuriken X. Even without lightweight materials, I get +200% recharge speed. The exception being soldiers, infiltrators, krogan sentinel, and asari vanguard. Sniping stasised enemies is too much fun. Oh btw, who's got two thumbs and finally unlocked the Mattock? THIS GUY!!! (Mattock II actually ) Still kinda weak, but the accuracy and fire rate more than make up for it. No more avenging and vidicating for me.

[Waldorf and Statler]

 

Bioware should make this happen

[Hot Heart]

Allow the Asari huntress with PTSD to carry a gun? Yeah, right...

[Thorgi Duke of Frisbee]

http://escort-missio...kes-me-furious/

To reiterate my position; it's fine to be unhappy about the ending. But screw off if you're trying to pressure BioWare into changing it. You're threatening the very industry we all hold near and dear when you pull absolute bullshit like this. It's an attack on creative expression, and if BioWare caves and makes the ending "work" for their "fans", then we are truly fucked.

 

And this http://www.destructoid.com/why-mass-effect-3-haters-need-to-calm-down-223966.phtml

Edited March 19, 2012 by DukeOfPwn

[Cyber Rat]

Bethesda already changed Fallout 3's ending for the better with DLC. Nobody was fucked over it. Nagging how the ending is awful is fine. But filing legal complaints is just plain silly.

[Waldorf and Statler]

We're welcome to dislike the ending. Plenty of works, including books and movies, have had their ending changed when the author went apeshit. The Reaper's entire purpose was rewritten for this ending.

 

You're welcome to not care about the ending, but being an apologist is just as annoying to us as us asking, not demanding, for a better ending is to you.

[deanb]

  On 3/19/2012 at 5:58 PM, Vargras said:

Man, the shit I find on tumblr.

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

It's all giving increasing support to the Indoctrination/Dream theories. Take a look at the pictures below.

 

This is what you see right as you get smacked with Harbinger's giant laser of get-the-fuck-out.

 

This is what you see any time Shepard enters/exits one of the dream sequences in the game.

 

Looks awfully similar, no? In addition, if you turn around after regaining control, you can apparently spot the burned out trees from the dreams. And last I saw, there weren't any trees in bombed-out 22nd century London.

 

That's a bit of a leap considering:

 

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You know that Shepard and err..the gay black pilot dude..calvin? Err whatever. Are clones right? And Tali is actually a human with her fingers cut off. Using similar assets isn't much of a thing to get giddy about in this of all games

 

I'm still kind of amused how people will "totally love Bioware forever" because of some fanfic "But it was all a dream" story

Also I'm pretty sure the base game that everyone played the other week is the game. That's it as it will be forever and ever. DLC, as I've been told many times, doesn't actually count on what is the "complete and finsihed game" or not.

 

[SixTwoSixFour]

I wrote a story 4 u gaiz

 

 

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“I still cant beleive I survived that,” said Shepard. “Yes, you blew up all the reapers and yet you are okay and so is earth you are a hero,” said Liara. Then they kissed and it was really gross. Liara walked away and then shepard went to the normandy.

 

Shepard was standing on the normandy when suddenly there was a reaper. For a minute he was scared but then Joker blew it up and he said “whew, that was really close.” Then EDI said “Sheprad we have a new team member but shes in trouble and you need to save her.” So they flew the ship.

 

When they got there there were lots of dead cebrerus and Shepard said what happened here. He pulled out his Carnifix and started headshooting all the guys and they couldnt stop him. When he got to the base, it was on fire, and he said “I have to move fast before the fire is too bad.” He went in and killed some more guys but then there were tougher guys and he had to hide. He tried to hedshoot them but he couldnt, and he said “what do I do”

 

Then they were all killed, and shepard said “wow who killed all these guys, they saved me. I hope they are on my side because if they are not that is very bad.”

 

Then a girl walked up to him and said “Hello commander shepard, I am Liara’s sister Jessica.” Her hair was really pretty and she didnt look tired at all from killing all those guys, and shepard was really impresed. Shepard could tell she was a better biotc than him and he knew he had to have her on his team. So he said “I need to have you on my team.” And she said “I am already on your team.” And he said “Awesome.”

“Shepard I joined your team because we have to go on a suicide mission,” said Jessica. “The Collectors are back but this time they are the Reapers.”

 

“Im really good at those,” said shepard, and they both laughed. Then they went back to the normandy. Back on the noramndy Joker tried to ask Jessica out but she wasn’t interested. Then he was sad because she was so cute, but he said, I guess I dont deserve her. They headed to the collector base but then there were geth.

 

After that they went to Omega, because they couldnt get to the base, and they knew they needed more guys. So they went to find Wrex but he wouldnt join them. He said that he was too old to fight, and Shepard was mad, because he thought that was dumb. So he said “Wrex, youre my favorite Wrex on the Citadel” and Wrex said “okay shepard” So they went to get Mordin but then they remembered that Mordin was dead so they didnt get Mordin.

 

“Shepard I cant fight while the genofag is making me sick,” said Wrex, and so they had to go fix the genophaeg. So they tried to fix it but they couldnt fix it and they didnt know what to do. Then Jessica used her biotic powers to fix it and they were really impresed. “Now we can fight the collectors” said shepard but Jessica said “not yet, we still need more people.”

 

Shepard didnt know where to get more people so he tried calling Garrus but Garrus was doing some callibrasions and couldnt help. So he called jacob but jacob didn’t pick up, what an asshole. Then the Lusive Man said “shepard I will help you, even though we are not good friends.” And shepard was surprised but he said okay, because the lusive man is really powerful and he needs the help. Then the normandy got a bigger gun and they were ready to fight the collectors.

 

They used the ship and then the reapers were there, and cerberus was there too, and shepard was like “lusive man why are the cerberus here,” and lusive man said “i dont know shepard, we will have to blow them up.” He felt bad because they were his friends, but he didnt have a choice. Then then blew them all up, and it was really tough but they won. Then Shepard said “we have to land” so they landed on the ship.

 

They tried to jump off but the other ship was too big and they couldnt get in, so Jessica blew it open with her powers. They climbed in the big hole and took off their helmets cause they were uncomfortable. They went through the ship andhtey killed lots of guys and they didn’t stop until they didn’t know what to do. The ship was really big and there were too many guys to shoot them all so they didnt know what to do. Then Shepard said “We have to kill more” so they did.

 

Then the boss came out and said “you kiled too many of my guys, now I will kill you.” And shepard was really scared because the boss was really strong, but then jessica kissed him and siad “we’ll win this shepard” and he knew that they would. So they beat the boss, and he ran away, but he was alive. Shepard said “dammit” but he knew that they would get him still.

 

The boss had locked the door behind him and they couldnt follow him, and even jessicas biotics couldnt open it. Shepard was sure that they couldnt win when Mordin showed up and said “leave this to me.” Shepard was happy to see Mordin since it had been a long time. Then mordin opened the door and they went after the boss.

 

The boss was waiting for them and he said “you wont be able to hurt me this time” and shepard said “yes i will” and then he shot him and the boss was really surprised because it hurt. The boss started to die and he said “i cant believe you beat the suicide mission, we were almost the reapers.” And shepard said “nobody is going to be the reapers” and he killed them. Then the base started to explode and Jessica and Sheaprd barely got back to the normandy in time but they were okay.

 

Joker flew the ship away, and everything was okay. Then Jessica said “you beat the reapers but can you beat me” and she led shepard to her room and then they closed the door and had the sex.

Then Tali kicked down the door and said “Shepard, the elcor are the reapers!”

 

TO BE CONTINUED

Edited March 19, 2012 by SixTwoSixFour

[Waldorf and Statler]

Did you actually write that? Because if you did, bravo good sir. You have captured the brilliance of a mary sue fanfic, mixed with the fact she's not the central character.

 

 

also

 

 

badasfully: Shepard, you knew this day was coming.