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Stupidest video game weapons


VicariousShaner
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List the absolute stupidest weapons you can think of. Limit yourself to one at a time please.

 

Wakka_KHREC.png

 

Notice what hes holding.

A beach ball.

That is his weapon against giant enemy death squads and Cthulu.

It does the most damage of any weapon in the game.

His Final weapon stuns whatever you hit for a number of rounds.

The other weapons in the game include: A legendary sword, A Katana, a Beast's claws, a Magical Voodoo doll that has magical abilities (stupid, but the blitzball has no such explanation), a spear, and finally a magic rod that can summon giant beings to fight for you.

WUT

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Balls can be a deadly force to be reckoned with.

 

 

 

but as for some of the stupidest weapons in video games, I must name a few:

 

1) The Klobb from Goldeneye on the N64. Beyond pathetic damage and tiny magazine, dual wielding these babies only made you twice as dumb. Even after emptying a magazine into a soldier, you would have to reload and fire again just to hope to cause him some minor discomfort.

 

2) The Razorback for the Sniper in TF2. Nowadays, it's just a sign of how clueless to your surroundings you are. In it's initial release form when it also decreased your movement speed, it showed you were just a moron.

 

3) The Gunblade. Could have been something interesting like a giant bayonet mounted to a ridiculous gun, but instead the gun just ends in a blade. Do you have to reload these things? Why are there revolver and magazine-fed gunblades? Does not loading the gunblade make it do less damage? What even happens if you pull the trigger, since there is no way for the bullet to exit the gun part?

 

4) The Keyblade. It's not even a blade. Just adding the word "blade" to something that is not sharp does not make it a blade.

 

and the list will go on...

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Sorry for this weaboo moment, but in ff8 the gunblade makes sens....in ff8.

pulling the trigger vibrates the blade with a shockwave to increase damage. Kind of like those vibratin knives they use to cut meat on infomercials.

 

Dont get me wrong, its a stupid weapon, but at least theres some reasoning and explanation for it in its own universe.

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.

but as for some of the stupidest weapons in video games, I must name a few:

 

1) The Klobb from Goldeneye on the N64. Beyond pathetic damage and tiny magazine, dual wielding these babies only made you twice as dumb. Even after emptying a magazine into a soldier, you would have to reload and fire again just to hope to cause him some minor discomfort.

 

2) The Razorback for the Sniper in TF2. Nowadays, it's just a sign of how clueless to your surroundings you are. In it's initial release form when it also decreased your movement speed, it showed you were just a moron.

 

3) The Gunblade. Could have been something interesting like a giant bayonet mounted to a ridiculous gun, but instead the gun just ends in a blade. Do you have to reload these things? Why are there revolver and magazine-fed gunblades? Does not loading the gunblade make it do less damage? What even happens if you pull the trigger, since there is no way for the bullet to exit the gun part?

 

4) The Keyblade. It's not even a blade. Just adding the word "blade" to something that is not sharp does not make it a blade.

 

and the list will go on...

 

Ok, I have some problems here.

 

.I meant "stupid" weapons, not "useless weapons" I may have to change my original post. I also said one at a time and to add a picture, but whatever. Number 1 and 2 count as "useless" although the second one could be arguable. I think the Razorback can be used to an OK extent sometimes, but lets not turn this into a TF2 weps thread.

 

 

For The Kayblade, I dont really get your argument. Its not supposed to be sharp, its blunt. And Sora wields it like a blade, and "KeyWeapon" doesnt really have the same ring to it. Besides, this is "stupid weapons" not "stupid weapon names". Also, out of all the weps from KH you chose the Keyblade? huh.

 

 

So my choice for this round will be a KH weapon, one much much stupider than the keyblade. BEHOLD:

 

Luxord_Days.png

 

 

A playing card, Luxord here uses a giant-ass playing card to slap his foes silly. Damn.

Edited by VicariousShaner
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Sorry for this weaboo moment, but in ff8 the gunblade makes sens....in ff8.

pulling the trigger vibrates the blade with a shockwave to increase damage.

If pulling the trigger is releasing energy and there is no barrel or exhaust for it to escape from at the opposite end of the blade, then YOU JUST BLEW YOUR HAND/ARM OFF. Definitely the choice for a SeeD commando.

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and yeah it probably hurts to get hit with a really fast boomerang, but youre not going to kill monsters with it, you jerk.

 

You know aborigines use boomerangs for hunting right?

why don't they just use a gun?

 

 

I can take a few guesses.

 

Guns are harder to make than Boomerangs.

Boomerangs dont use ammo.

Boomerangs dont make it so that you have to eat around the bullet.

 

Im guessing here, but those are some reasons.

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For The Kayblade, I dont really get your argument. Its not supposed to be sharp, its blunt. And Sora wields it like a blade, and "KeyWeapon" doesnt really have the same ring to it. Besides, this is "stupid weapons" not "stupid weapon names". Also, out of all the weps from KH you chose the Keyblade? huh.

Again, it is not a blade. Just because I grip it with my hand does not mean it needs a blade name. If it's blunt, it's more like a mace used to bludgeon someone, or hell, why not even call it an axe? Just because you try to fix stupid with stupid does not make it unstupid. The Keyblade is a stupid weapon.

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Shit, even the Huntsman takes more skill.

The Huntsman takes any kind of skill? I just fire it randomly and get headshots because of laughable hit-detection.

 

You're SUPPOSED to use the Huntsman by predicting where opponents will be and firing, rather than where they are at the time you fired. Kinda like how the Direct Hit and Loch-n-Load are meant to be used.

 

But people usually just spam it.

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and yeah it probably hurts to get hit with a really fast boomerang, but youre not going to kill monsters with it, you jerk.

 

You know aborigines use boomerangs for hunting right?

why don't they just use a gun?

 

 

I can take a few guesses.

 

Guns are harder to make than Boomerangs.

Boomerangs dont use ammo.

Boomerangs dont make it so that you have to eat around the bullet.

 

Im guessing here, but those are some reasons.

Well if those are all problems, why not just use spears? I imagine theyre a lot easier to use than boomerangs.

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and yeah it probably hurts to get hit with a really fast boomerang, but youre not going to kill monsters with it, you jerk.

 

You know aborigines use boomerangs for hunting right?

But that's because it's a hunting craft honed down to perfection by the Aborigines through passing it down through generations of hunters. Everywhere else (even in videogames), not so much.

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