Last OK Movie You Saw

[danielpholt]

Dom Hemingway

 

It was interesting. It's been a while since Jude Law has come through my home viewing area. I didn't have high expectations, nor did I think it would be the worst thing ever, because Jude Law just does that to me. Never really good. Never really bad. Just there. But, I thought it was okay.

You'll never forget that opening scene though right?

[TheRevanchist]

 

Dom Hemingway

 

It was interesting. It's been a while since Jude Law has come through my home viewing area. I didn't have high expectations, nor did I think it would be the worst thing ever, because Jude Law just does that to me. Never really good. Never really bad. Just there. But, I thought it was okay.

You'll never forget that opening scene though right?

 

Felt like that scene was too long.  It was played out and it just.. kept... going...

[Hot Heart]

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: Sword of Destiny

 

I've not seen the original in 10+ years, but then I was never blown away like everyone else (I didn't see it for a few years after its release though). I was interested in this because it's directed by Yuen Woo-Ping who is the best martial arts action director ever (seriously, check out his filmography) and can get very creative (Twin Warriors is a favourite of mine).

 

Of course, I would never consider him a visionary director and so this sequel is more of a workman-like, middle-of-the-road martial arts film. The plot is very simple, with maybe a couple of surprises, and there is some decent action with some creative flourishes; such as one fighter's robes swishing and gliding as she tosses out darts, or the battle on a frozen lake, or one witch-like character who flits about like Nightcrawler.

 

All in all, it's not a great watch but it's not bad either. It is a little distracting because everyone's speaking English so when I went with my original instinct to select Chinese audio with English subtitles, everyone's mouth didn't match up.

[danielpholt]

I saw Harold and Kumar once. That was fine.

 

(I posted in the wrong thread again).

Edited March 1, 2016 by danielpholt

[deanb]

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Jesus Justice.

 

Jesse Eisenberg was utter shit. I don't think he's read a single page of comic with Lex Luthor in it and that includes the one with 40 cakes! Affleck is Batman, Cavill is the same Superman he was in the last film making Batman look like a cheery dude, and Gadot was alright, we'll need to see her in a bigger film to understand her WW I think. Jeremy Irons is a pleasure as always.

 

If you've seen the trailer you've essentially seen the core of the film with one minor difference

The senator is actually sorta pro-Superman, compared to how she is portrayed in the trailers.

 

 

Music in Man of Steel was better too. Also there's a weird "Infinity Well Scene from Ultron" cameo and it's even weirder than what Thor had going on. Clearly trying to put in all the pieces to set up a Justice League film and ....look it's in the trailers but

Darksied coming

.

 

 

I believe it was Booster Gold, but could be Orion given the use of the red suit and what looks like a boom tube. It just came out of nowhere, so jarring.

In fact the editing in this film was piss poor too. They had an origin scene for Batman (in case you didn't know..he failed to stop a criminal that later shot dead his uncle leading him to...wait wrong overly repeated origin story). It didn't need one, the film would be none the worse for it, and they manage to do a super-cut of it later in the film where it's more relevant.

 

 

The goddamn Jesus analogies too.

- It's out on Easter Weekend. Where Jesus dies for our sins and is reborn.

- There's loads of talk about gods from the sky and such

- The spear of fucking Longinus. Bullets make way more sense for a flying super-being than a spear but nope he's jesus so needs to be stabbed in the side with a spear.

 

 

The fights are great, it's neat to see all three on the big screen, and there's a lot of Dark Knight Returns homages in the film. But...I've seen the film and come away more confused than if I'd just seen the trailers, and I think the crux of all the confusion is around Luthor. He was terribly cast, written, directed and acted imo. He was like some poor mans rich Joker than a potential candidate for President and super genius. Braniac would swat him like a fly rather than join with him. His overall plots and aims seemed almost aimless, I think poorly told. We're gonna need a follow up film to explain what was going on in this film. Which is bad. The MCU stuff gets critized for wedging in Avengers plot-lines to the single films but they tell a single cohesive story in a single film but this is clearly a unlabelled "Part 1".

 

Also Batman kills people.

[TheMightyEthan]

Also Batman kills people.

0/10 right there.

[madbassman39]

Batman v Superman. Pretty much what Dean said through out. I really liked the Batman fight scenes, even if they are a bit uncharacteristic for the character that DC has set up for well over 50 years.

 

I enjoyed it, but there is no way I could say it was a good movie, it leans more on the bad movie side but because I really enjoyed the fight sequences I would recommend it to anyone who wants to see the two big DC hitters... hit each other.

 

 

The Justice League stuff felt a bit crammed in. I would have enjoyed seeing the flash as a hero now rather than winking at a future origin story. Batman just having a feeling that things are going to get worse to form a Justice League was a bit of a stretch, even if he had the vision and the visit from the future. Also isn't the amazing thing about Bruce is he's able to keep his identity a secret even from the Justice League?

I did not expect to see the Death of Superman story line crammed into this movie either. I mean I know we got Doomsday, but I honestly didn't think they were going to follow the comic book all the way to the ending. I just didn't like this version of Doomsday, it wasn't bad but it just created to give conflict to the characters to group together.

 

[deanb]

Tomorrowland.

 

While I quite liked some of the visuals and themes it hand (even if a bit on the nose, but it is a kids movie) I think the pacing was a bit off (really dragged out on what the "big bad" was until towards the end) and the villians aims/ideals where a bit vague/wishy-washy. It's kind of a film to watch with your kid if they're into the "Maker" movement I guess.

 

edit: It is a bit sort of like "Bioshock in the future", which I guess is a minor plus of sorts I guess.

 

edit 2: Also while it doesn't lay them out in a strict fashion it does have rules for the "time travel" within the movie which it follows which imo is always a plus cos a lot of films with "time travel" usually forget their rules. And I'll be honest I watch Doctor Who and that's a terrible offender.

[danielpholt]

Tomorrowland.

 

While I quite liked some of the visuals and themes it hand (even if a bit on the nose, but it is a kids movie) I think the pacing was a bit off (really dragged out on what the "big bad" was until towards the end) and the villians aims/ideals where a bit vague/wishy-washy. It's kind of a film to watch with your kid if they're into the "Maker" movement I guess.

 

edit: It is a bit sort of like "Bioshock in the future", which I guess is a minor plus of sorts I guess.

 

edit 2: Also while it doesn't lay them out in a strict fashion it does have rules for the "time travel" within the movie which it follows which imo is always a plus cos a lot of films with "time travel" usually forget their rules. And I'll be honest I watch Doctor Who and that's a terrible offender.

You know, I thought Hugh Laurie's character made an awful lot of sense. It felt like they decided they needed a 'Villain' and forced that role onto him.

 

The film itself is alright. Really enjoyed the opening 40 or so minutes; the final 20 is a bit of a mess.

 

 

 

 

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[deanb]

Hugh Laurie was great, I just felt his characters aims/ideals were a bit broad ranging and undefined, such as they'd gone through and made the film n then gone "wait we need a bad guy". His main arc was also central to the final 20 minute mess

 

I think it would make a good video game though. It's not entirely in the right order, but damn does it have strong Bioshock parallels.

[danielpholt]

Hugh Laurie was great, I just felt his characters aims/ideals were a bit broad ranging and undefined, such as they'd gone through and made the film n then gone "wait we need a bad guy". His main arc was also central to the final 20 minute mess

 

I think it would make a good video game though. It's not entirely in the right order, but damn does it have strong Bioshock parallels.

 

More so the generic robot fights than the Hugh Laurie plot points. I enjoyed the portal aspect, but it all felt a little too contrived.

[TCP]

Terminator Genysis or however the fuck they spelled it. I was close to dumping this in the "bad" thread but parts of it were fun, stupid fun, but fun.... but make no mistake, it's definitely on the lower end of "ok".

I do believe that somewhere in this stupid mess of a film is a good idea. I don't even mind going back and redoing the first Terminator film as the first act does. But things get real stupid when they go to 2017. Terminator John Connor was spoiled by the trailers, so the only redeeming part of it which would have been the twist, was spoiled. That was stupid and did not need to be there. The whole 2017 storyline did not need to exist. Also how come Kyle Reese was a little kid in 2017 but an older teenager in Terminator Salvation's 2018? Clearly this movie gave no fucks about anything Terminator after T2. Maybe that's for the best. 

It kind of reminded me of Amazing Spider-Man 2, seemed like their was too many chefs in the kitchen. It shouldn't be that hard to make a good Terminator film.

Though it was cool hearing Daenerys Targaryn and the 11th Doctor talk without accents.

[TCP]

Fantastic Four (2015).

Well, this is on Netflix now. I have to admit I was very curious why this was so bad. Now I know. What a mess of a fucking movie. It's a great example on the wrong way to take an IP. I was left wondering what the point of it all was. The bar was so low to be better than the first movie, yet, somehow they made it even worse.

Edited May 9, 2016 by The Cowboy Poet

[Mister Jack]

How'd it manage to get on your "ok" list?

 

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[TCP]

What! I posted that in the crap thread. Ethan must have moved it. DAMN YOU ETHAN I THOUGHT IT WAS CRAP!!! CRAAAAP!!!!

[deanb]

X-Men: Apocalypse

 

So I went into this expecting it to be pretty damn terrible, as it says within the film "The third one is always bad". But I was pleasantly surprised. It's not Days of Future Past good, and certainly not Civil War good but it's better than the shittier X-Men films. Main reason for going was part of this geek Meet-up group my therapist suggested I join and that was all good.

 

I felt the main issue with it was that the writing was rather poor. They put out Chekhovs gun fairly early on so you knew how the menace of Apocalypse would be concluded. I felt it struggled to do the ensemble cast very well, we left the film and were like "Did Psylocke say anything at all or she purely there for boobs?". There's also a scene it of some impact that ultimately felt like it had none there and was more a way to tie up a wee loose end. However Magneto was great in it and his storyline was neat in setting up the terrorist of sorts he would become. Also showing off a chunk of his powers, which are waaay more than the films have ever let on except I guess the Golden Gate bridge (he even got his force shield!). Magneto is an omega level EM-spectrum controlling mutant living on a giant ball of iron flying through space.

 

There was some nice fun moments throughout, with mainly Quicksilver and Nightcrawler providing the comic relief.

 

Also a remark from the Deadpool film came true

 

Oh there's a post-credit scene, but it's a bit poor tbh.

 

 

So yeah, I went into it knowing Havoc died cos net sucks in those things. It was so unimpactful though, there was no time given to build up the relation between Cyclops n Havoc, and no time after it's revealed he'd died to sort of "mourn" or whatever cos Striker appears pretty much right after.

 

Storm seems to have little reason to join the Horsemen. She was a great Storm n all but I didn't feel she was a good choice for a Horseman. At least Magneto had super strong reasons to join, and he had to be pushed the most.

 

Jean was Sansa Stark, I guess it's not really the directors problem that the film and TV show have come out so close together but yeah. It makes her accent weird too. And yeah on the chekhovs gun "I feel like I'm burning up inside, like a great fire within me". At least they went full on phoeneix force at the end instead of wearing a red dress, she's all like psychic flames pouring out in a phoenix visage and destroying Apocalypse where others couldn't. I like that Apocalypse, who was pursuing godhood, kinda looked upon her in his death with a sort of "Oh shit, she's actually a god and this is great to gaze upon one".

 

Oh I was the only one in our group to know that the post-credit scene of a briefcase containing genetic samples and engraved with "Essex Corp" is Nathaniel Essex, aka Mister Sinister and keen geneticist.

 

 

[TheMightyEthan]

Wow, they need to do better advertising.  I didn't even know this was out yet.

[deanb]

I'm not super sure it is. I don't know when Memorial Day is but I know that's when it's out in the US cos we had a discussion on that being the stupidest way to say when a film is out. There's quite a few films out n coming out with not-quite close release dates. The Nice Guys is out in the US but not until next week for us. Civil War was similar, Zootopia too.

[TheMightyEthan]

Memorial Day is this coming weekend.  Even so, I didn't have any idea that it was coming out in the next month.

[Mal]

The Angry Birds Movie.

 

Note: I didn't pay to see this. For one reason or another, a streamer I follow showed a ripped copy from China. It might be a stream of a stream. I also didn't know this was a thing until a week or two ago when I was driving around the city and I spotted a billboard.

 

Anyhow, it's an alright movie. It's silly but the plot makes sense for a kid movie. Some jokes are for kids (that goes on for a bit too long) while others are aimed for the adults in the room. Kids could watch worse movies.

[Mr. GOH!]

I'm just surprised you managed to get through it. Other folks have told me it's unwatchable unless you're a child.

[Mal]

To be fair it was on one half of the screen while I worked on my thesis and the price of free can minimize criticisms. If I paid for it and it was the only thing on my plate? Nah. If I noticed how some of the jokes went on for too long while working on my thesis, then it'll become more apparent if I focus on it. Also the story is kind of silly.

 

As a kid film, again, it could be worse.

[deanb]

Eurgh. I'm not really keen on the "this film is naf but it'll be alright for kids" stuff, it really demeans children and why we end up with stuff like Angry Birds: The Movie in the first place. If a film is shit then don't expose your kids to it or that's what they'll expect films to be. There's an increasing cadre of films that work great for both kids and adults alike such as most recently Zootropolis which was a bit heavy handed on the racism thing but kids can grasp those themes and the adults can be amused by Godfather references. I watched the Peanuts film with my younger siblings and I loved it, and the next morning I woke up to them watching it again and it wasn't a stupid film at all and very much a film that kneels down to eye level when speaking to the kids.

 

It's why Pixar have done so well, and heck majority of Disney films too. It's like parents that'll buy the crappy food for their kids n be like "I wouldn't eat it but it's good enough for the kids". If you won't eat it why force it on the kids. Children are developing, if anything hold what they consume to a higher standard.

 

I may or may not have a slight repressed beef. (and don't take it personal Mal, you've had no influence on any children I know to have nurtured the beef)

[Mal]

Dean, I get what you mean. For clarification though, what I mean when it is okay for kids is that the movie isn't dumb. I didn't lose brain cells like I can with some adult movies or questioning what the hell am I watching. 

 

I like the general premise of the movie where Red, the Angry Bird, saves the day because he can see through bullshit that other people cannot see. In this case, the hoodwinking by the Pigs. Then there's the typical crushing of a childhood hero so you yourself have to step up to the plate to do what needs to be done.

 

The movie isn't shit, it just okay and that is fine. I wouldn't go out of my way to watch it but I wouldn't be opposed to watch it. As for it being unwatchable unless you're a child... I think people are thinking that because of the Angry Birds theme.

[Mr. GOH!]

X-Men: Apocalypse.

 

It's messy and no character has a full, satisfying arc. Tons of lazy writing, from the Wolverine inclusion, to the stunted arcs for Cyclops and Jean Grey, to the way MAgneto is given a family that is almost immediately murdered in order to establish his resurgent hatred of non-mutants. And then, after Magneto has killed countless people, Xavier invites him to stay at his school. Everything felt airy and insubstantial and done by writer fiat rather than like these were actual characters with real relationships. Oscar Isaac's villain is a dick just to be a dick, it seems. And the deus ex machina at the end is telegraphed in the most bland way possible. There's so much for me to hate on.

 

I did like the action scenes (even if Magneto's world-ending use of his power seemed both bizarre and really slow to destroy everything; I'm sure we could come up with cooler ways to level-up Magneto's power use) and of course Quicksilver is pretty great. 

 

A lot goes unexplained, like why Apocalypse, or anyone, would consider Angel to be among the most powerful mutants alive. And why Angel is a jerk. And why Psylocke is considered to be a powerful mutant. And why Psylocke would wear such an uncomfortable-looking outfit. 

 

But the action and X-men-iness of it is enough to keep it out of the bad movie thread.