Mister Jack

Phoenix can't go anywhere near a defense table after AA4. His aura of pure awesome would set the entire courtroom ablaze after how that game ended.

I don't do much crafting because I only have two of everything and I don't want to lose my originals. I did manage to get a refined metal, but a fat lot of good that does on its own.

It's YOU!

Well we do have that Phoenix Wright/Professor Layton crossover comi--- Sorry, I had to go change my pants in the middle of that sentence.

How much extra do you have to pay to guarantee Hulk powers?

I would post something with Borat here but I don't want to scare off the new people.

I hate seeing commercials for Sonic's on tv constantly when I don't have a Sonic's that's less than an hour away.

I dunno why but I like having more Europeans here.

Tramp. Don't be jealous.

That's extraodinary. It's like "Hey, we fucked up, but look at what big dorks you all are with passwords like this. You're kinda at fault for this too!"

But I always go back. If you saw the hotness that I'm trying to rescue, you would too.

It's a real perk. There's also one for females called Lady Killer, but characters of either gender can use either or both perks. The male one is far more helpful, though, since there are way more male enemies than female ones. I got both, though, just for the conversation options.

Kill me however many times you please. I'll just come back again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And againandagainandagainandagainandagainandagainandagainandagainandagainandagain.

We'll call you Lies.

I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm just saying. From that mindset, that's how you should look at it.

You may be pretty handy with a sword but I'm super fast and super agile. You can try to cut me but I'll just jump right up on that sword then wall-jump up your arms to your face and slap your shit. Just saying.

What's her name?

Even if you're trying to "role play" or something you could say your character isn't gay but will still hit on gay guys to get non-sexual favors.

You wanna throw down, sucka? I don't care how immortal you think you are, I am an unstoppable force of meat nature.

Do these people not know what "Confirmed Bachelor" means? And even if you do, it's one of the best perks. You'd have to be a fool not to want it unless you're deliberately trying to challenge yourself.

Delicious. Thanks, Launch.

Fair enough. I didn't know if you had Chick-Fil-A. I know a number of people who never even heard of it before I told them, which is just extraordinary.

You know what, 25% off is still pretty goddamn good.

Gonna get meatslapped.

For god's sake, PLEASE give us a Civ 5 discount. I promise I'll buy it then. Honest.